First of all, if he had not triggered my first psychotic episode something else would have. Second of all I was only high on undiagnosed mania and drunk on alcohol. I’ve never done recreational drugs except weed a couple of times. But I knew he was flirting with me. I could feel his breath on the back of my neck as we were giving a group presentation for our nutrition class. He had barely done any work besides bringing the diet supplements he had for support materials in our class presentation. The other 3 guys in our group kinda did their own thing. After the project was over, I saw a new DM on Facebook (the year was 2013 and Facebook was way more popular amongst young people then) so I opened it.
To my surprise Mr.Sexy-Neck-Breather invited me to a party at his buddy’s place. The party was in downtown Toronto not too far from where I had been living at the time, Being a young naive girl I did not hesitate to accept the invitation. Once I got to the subway station he met me there and took me to this really nice penthouse. The ceiling was high like a loft. The colours were green and grey. You had to go through the kitchen to get to the living area where there was luxury furniture. To my surprise, There were a lot of Catholic items in the penthouse like rosaries and small paintings of the Virgin Mary. It seemed to be an odd place for what happened next.
Mr. Sexy-Neck-Breather took me by the hand and led me up the stairs to a small bedroom that had 2 twin beds and a desk. Next to the desk there was a large bag full of what I later found out to be cocaine. He took some of the drugs and put it in my hand offering it to me.
But I declined. I still stayed with him though which was both a dangerous and naive move. And I decided to drink that night. We went out and took a taxi to a bar that was directly across from the mental hospital where I stayed for a month and got admitted to a week or two after going to the bar. I saw my crush sell what was probably his ADHD meds to a homeless man there. He also did a few more lines. And we made out. Once we got back to the penthouse, everyone except me and his friend who lived at the penthouse were doing cocaine. I just remember his friend telling me that he quit drugs after seeing how much damage they did to my crush. Then I asked if I could stay over and he said “yes”. Then my crush wouldn’t keep his hands off of me and his friend fought him off for me. I’m thankful for his friend because if he hadn’t been there I probably would have been raped. He passed out shortly after.
The next morning he didn’t remember much. At least he said he did not remember much. A day or two later he texts me. “Was I trying to f*ck you the other night? That’s so bad! Seeing as I pretty much have a girlfriend”.
I went back to class. He wasn’t there. In fact he had mysteriously dropped out of school. At that time I had been trying to start a YouTube channel too. I posted some pole fitness videos that didn’t do too well then I made this awful video that involved me spanking my own butt. I had hoped he’d find it and message me back. I got a random message from a random user on Youtube. “What a yummy little butt” he said. I wanted it to be my crush so badly that my brain couldn’t accept that this stranger was not my crush. I kept talking to them and even sent them my home address not knowing it wasn’t him. The next day, because I had sent the address, a bunch of weird things were seemingly unfolding and I thought it was because my crush, based on random unrelated things I had seen around my apartment and on the internet
Stay tuned as I post pt 2 of this story next week!
